Thursday, 7 February 2013

Phew!! What a few weeks.

I have been just lurking here at Chalky's. No posts, not even any trusty hooking. It seemed as if all our energies had to be directed on a fitting final farewell. A roller coaster week really.And one that has left me a little fragile and emotional.
My sister in law and I decided to arrange the floral tributes ourselves. We wanted to feel a real part of the last jobs for Mum. Iris' for Iris.

 A posy of spring flowers from her Grandchildren and Great Grandson William

And an arrangement for the Village Hall for the gathering after the service.

We were able to tell our story of our Mum and add little bits that weave the memories of a lifetime together.
Some heather from Beverley's garden which dear Dad bought back as a cutting after his first visit to their new house over the border. Some twigs of olive from our garden, remembering how she loved her trips to Spain. Rosemary tucked in for remembrance.

Of course everything went well. We cried.We laughed. We told stories. We listened to tales.We caught up with family we had not seen for far too long. We ate too much cake but, a message left on our answer machine said it all.--

" This is might be a funny thing to say. But I had a lovely day. You did your Mum proud."

What else could we ask for. Now it is time to adjust and quietly come to terms with the fact that our last parent has left us. We have to move up a rung on the generation ladder.Most of all we must try and make our climb as dignified and caring as they all did for us.


  1. Pretty flower arrangements. That was a lovely message left on the answer phone. It probably was a lovely day but a very sad day too. Memories of your mum will always be in your hearts.
    Julie xxxxxxxxx

    1. Thank you so much for leaving such a lovely comment.

  2. The flowers are beautiful. Your last paragraph is especially touching.

    1. Thank you so much for leaving such a supportive comment

  3. The flowers are beautiful Linda, sending hugs xx

  4. Gorgeous flowers Linda.I hope you are treating yourselves gently and allowing the last bit of winter to give yourselves time to think.Soon the spring will come in earnest and I am sure lots of outdoor play with William! I like that image of moving a rung up the ladder.I often look at the hands of us women,grandma,daughter and granddaughter and see how our hands have become like the previous generations were.My mum now has Grandma hands, soft and veined and warm and mine when all the dirt from gardening is gone they are just like my mums used to be.Lots of years of washing and cooking and caring and hand holding.I am sure William loves holding your hand Linda as he toddles on in his life.Much love and hugs Rachelxxx

  5. I am sure you gave Iris a wonderful send off and how lucky she was to have such a loving family.My Mum died when I was 26 and before my children were born.My father died when I was 36 but at least he got to meet my two children.All this time on I still miss them and cherish the role I play as Mum and Grandma to my children and grandchildren.As you say you have moved up a rung and have a new role to play and to enjoy.What a great example Iris was.

  6. The flowers are really beautiful - you did a splendid job, with the meaningful, personal touches. I'm sure that you were similarly thoughtful and meticulous with all the other arrangements for Iris's farewell, hence the uplifting message left for you afterwards. Take care of yourself now, as things quieten down.

  7. The flowers are beautiful - glad that everything went the way you wanted it to. xx

  8. Linda, I am so glad for the good you are celebrating in the life you shared with your mother-in-law.
    A little over three years ago my husband of 38 years died and several months later his dad died. My mother-in-law is living at an eldercare facility and nearing the end of her life. She is my last 'parent' and the transition you are confronting and wrote of so beautifully is one I will soon be facing.

    In the last few years I have especially pondered the story of Christ crying as he approached the tomb of His good friend Lazarus even though He knew He would speak the words God the Father told Him to speak to bring Lazarus back to life.

    While I am not keen on crying, I am glad that I can feel. And I understand and appreciatle the message left on your answering machine.

    Thanks for sharing this time with us.

  9. Found you by chance, what a strange coincidence. My mother,s funeral was on 6th Feb. She died the day before her 76th birthday. It's been a very strange time, just hitting me now. We had a nice family gathering afterwards too, kept thinking she ought to have been there, she would have loved it so much. Sending warm thoughts to you and your family.

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